Greeting Cards

“Suck My Penis Please” Card by Sleazy Greetings

Get ready for laughs and love with our “Suck My Penis Please” Valentine’s Day card. This hilarious card playfully begs your special someone to fulfill your desires, making it perfect for your significant other. Whether it’s Valentine’s Day, an anniversary, or just because, this quirky and fun card adds a naughty twist to your heartfelt message. Show your love and appreciation with a punny card that’s sure to bring smiles and giggles.

Not Your Average Greeting Cards

Let’s be real—some occasions call for more than just a sweet sentiment or a generic joke. That’s where sleazy greeting cards come in. Designed for those who laugh the loudest at the dirtiest jokes, these cards go where traditional ones wouldn’t dare. Whether it’s a birthday, bachelorette, breakup, or just a Tuesday, there’s a card here to perfectly match your filthy sense of humor.

Bold, Cheeky, and Outrageous

These aren’t your grandma’s greeting cards—unless she’s the one with the best spicy comebacks. From cheeky innuendos to downright outrageous sayings, each card is crafted to shock, delight, and definitely get a reaction. Some cards are rude, some are raunchy, and others toe the line of “should I really be laughing at this?” But hey, if it makes your bestie snort-laugh or your partner blush, we say mission accomplished.

Quality You Can Feel

Printed with bold graphics and unapologetically dirty humor, these cards are made from high-quality cardstock coated with a matte finish for a beautiful texture and feel. Printed in Colorado, USA, on eco-friendly paper, each card comes with a matching kraft envelope made from 30% Post-Consumer Waste recycled paper—because even sleazy can be sustainable. Perfect for your significant other, friend, or family member, these cards say it with sass, spice, and zero filter.

• Blank inside
• A7 size (5″ x 7″)
• Printed in the USA onto a paper matte stock.
• Comes with a matching kraft envelope made from 30% Post-Consumer Waste recycled paper
• Uncoated texture on the inside for easy writing without smudging
• Printed on thick, durable cardstock for a high-quality finish

SKU: SG001217

UPC: 810171402172

Celebrate birthdays or anniversaries with a touch of humor and sarcasm with this pink cat-themed card. This card is perfect for your wife, friend, sister, or brother who has a good sense of humor. Made from sturdy card stock with a matte finish, this high-quality card has space inside for a personalized message. Printed in Colorado, USA, on eco-friendly paper, the card comes with a matching kraft envelope made from 30% Post-Consumer Waste recycled paper. Give the gift of laughter with this funny and sarcastic card.

• Message inside reads, “Actually the 6th cat thinks you’re a cunt too. Happy Birthday.”
• A7 size (5″ x 7″)
• Printed in the USA onto a paper matte stock.
• Comes with a matching kraft envelope made from 30% Post-Consumer Waste recycled paper
• Uncoated texture on the inside for easy writing without smudging
• Printed on thick, durable cardstock for a high-quality finish

SKU: SG000595

UPC: 810063485955

Your bestie’s birthday is coming up? Haven’t got a card for them yet? All other cards just don’t have the right vibe? Then look no further! This card is perfect for that friend whose nightstand is full of vibrating friends. This card folds to 5-inches by 7-inches and comes with a matching kraft envelope that perfectly compliments the color and texture of the card. Sleazy Greeting cards are designed and illustrated in the USA on thick, durable cardstock for a high-quality finish.

• Blank inside
• A7 size (5″ x 7″)
• Printed in the USA onto a paper matte stock.
• Comes with a matching kraft envelope made from 30% Post-Consumer Waste recycled paper
• Uncoated texture on the inside for easy writing without smudging
• Printed on thick, durable cardstock for a high-quality finish

SKU: SG000541

UPC: 810063485412

Remind your friends about their best qualities with this cheeky birthday card. This year, they should be as classy, sassy and bad assy as ever!

This card is perfect for anyone who loves a good laugh on their birthday. This punny card is the perfect way to show your love and appreciation with a bit a sarcasm for your brother or sister. Made from high-quality card stock with a matte finish, this card feels as special as your relationship. It’s blank inside, so you can write a heartfelt message. Printed in Colorado, USA, on eco-friendly paper, this card comes with a matching kraft envelope made from 30% Post-Consumer Waste recycled paper. Show your love and sense of humor with this funny and adorable card.

• Blank inside
• A7 size (5″ x 7″)
• Printed in the USA onto a paper matte stock.
• Comes with a matching kraft envelope made from 30% Post-Consumer Waste recycled paper
• Uncoated texture on the inside for easy writing without smudging
• Printed on thick, durable cardstock for a high-quality finish

SKU: SG000529

UPC: 810063485290